If he had had wanted any prove that his father had truly loved his mother, then Barnabas knew from the two entries he'd just read, was all that he needed.

Truly engrossed now, he continued to read.

'15 January 1988. Have returned to the Cannery. Shioban Todd has handled things well, in my absence. Julia came by. She seems quite pleased with my return to the cannery. She is of the opinion, that it will be therapeutic. Time will tell.'

'21 January 1988. Have secured a deal with Mr. Nicholas. The new deal will prove beneficial, I'm sure. Daniel has proven once more, his head for business. He asked to do the figures for the week, and I agreed. Have checked his findings, and not for the first time, he has been right. I have an idea that he will prove an asset to the Fleet. Barnabas however has no such intentions. Until his mother's death, he had every intention of becoming a doctor. An admirable profession, of which I hope one day, his interest will be renewed.'

'19 February 1988. Barnabas seems to resent Julia's presence here. After a suitable time had past, I had hoped that he would no longer blame Julia, alas, he is determined to hold her responsible. I wonder what his reaction would be, if he learned that it is mostly likely MY fault that his mother has died. If I had not succumbed, that night, if I hadn't bitten Maggie, then perhaps she and our son would still be alive. Nothing has made me regret night, more than this. If only….my whole life has been nothing, but ifs.'

'23 February 1988. I am worried about Barnabas. He has taken to wandering until all hours of the night. I know he is almost 14, but in his present sullen mood, I despair of what he may do. Julia and I have tried to help him deal with his grief, but he refuses all attempts.

He disappeared again tonight. I searched for him, but when I returned, he had already returned, and was asleep.
On his return, I suspect that he was rude to Julia, yet again, though she won't admit it. I am glad that she is here. I have come to anticipate seeing her, of late.'

'24 February 1988. A new problem has arisen. I fear that my oldest son, maybe discovering the truth about me. He came to me today, and said that he had a dream about the childhood of the 'first Barnabas,' His words have chilled me to the very marrow. If he should connect the child in his dream to me…but perhaps Julia is right, and he won't make the connection. But he is a bright boy, and curious. His interest in the past almost equals my own.

Julia and I plan to take Sarah and Daniel to Bangor, to see a movie, for their birthday. Then Julia insists on taking them for a McDonalds. How Lucas would have liked that! He and the twins always enjoyed their day trips with Aunt Julia. Mostly, I feel, because she was far too indulgent with them.'

'26 February 1988. Am I to be punished once more? Will this nightmare ever end? Will history be repeated yet again? Sarah, my darling little girl is desperately ill, with the same virus that claimed her mother and brother. Is she destined to share not only the same birthday, as my dear little sister, but also her fate? I cannot bear to lose her yet again! She must live! She must! Will Daniel, as her twin, share the same fate? Julia is optimistic, that she will find the answer this time. Oh, my dear Sarah and Daniel, I so hoped to make your 11th birthday a happy event, and once more I have failed. And once again, Barnabas is blaming Julia. I wish there were someway, to prove to him, that this is just not true.'

'18 March 1988. It has been almost two weeks, since I have seen Julia. On the occasions that I have, she has been exhausted. I have told her, to get some rest, but she refuses. She has been working almost 24 hrs a day, to try and find a solution to Sarah's illness.

There is light at the end of this dark tunnel, however, Daniel still shows no sigh of the virus, and Sarah is showing a slight improvement. Julia continues to be cautious, taking numerous blood samples form the child, until he complains of feeling like a pincushion.

Barnabas has become more open in his hostility to Julia. He has warned her, rather rudely, that nothing must happen to Sarah, or Daniel. When I asked him to apologise, he refused. Only the threat of sending Sabre away has made him do as I ask. Though knows as well as I do that that would never happen. I am much too fond of the dog myself.

Perhaps I am being too lenient with him, with all of them? Though discipline has never been my strong point…something which Maggie thought 'endearing.'

Julia has promised that if Sarah continues to improve, she may be allowed home. If this happens, then perhaps, Barnabas will end his vendetta against her. Though she remains silent, I know that he has hurt her very deeply. Sometimes, I can see it in her eyes, and it pains me very much, to know that my son, is responsible, and there seems to be nothing we can do.'

'28 March 1988. My fears have come true. My son has learned the truth about me, through his dreams! If only I had listened to him, when he first came to me, then I might have been prepared for what has happened. Not only has he discovered the truth, he is also as vampire!

Julia has discovered that the cell that she found in my bloodstream is heredity. I was so afraid of this! To think I am responsible for what he is! What kind of father am I? I should have known that I would never truly be free of the vile curse! Oh my dear, dear son, please forgive me, for what I've done.

Now I know the true reason, of his strangeness, for the last month. As he has slowly learned the truth about me, that vile cell has altered. Is there no cure for him? And if there is, will it affect his own children?

He hates me, and I don't blame him. He has threatened Julia once more, and this time, I know he plans to go through with it. I must protect her, even if it means destroying him.

After last night, I can not allow anything to happen to her. I can no longer hide my true feelings towards her, and so I have asked her to marry me. Though she was understandably sceptical about my proposal, she has accepted. Though the marriage will not be for awhile yet. Willie and Paige are quite delighted at the idea. Willie especially. '

'30 March 1988. Have seen Maggie and Lucas! Or rather their ghosts. Maggie has convinced Barnabas to accept Julia and my help. He has admitted to the break-in at Windcliffe, and has seen the report. Julia has discovered that the cell can be destroyed by using the same serum, she used on me. By altering it, to suit him, she feels certain, that once his thirst is curbed, she can work to cure him.

Sabre is recovering well. I had decided to destroy Barnabas, rather than let him go on as he is. Sabre, being his guardian, attacked me, and I was forced to shoot him. Only Julia's arrival at the mausoleum, stopped me from doing the second thing I regret most im my life.

Though he is willing to accept our help, Barnabas has made it quite clear that I will never be forgiven, for being responsible for what he is now, and for shooting Sabre.

He is not alone. I can never forgive myself, so why should he? But he is my son, and I will continue to love him, no matter what. I will not turn my back on him, when he needs me more than he ever has in his life.

I hope, if Julia is successful in her venture, that one day the dark forces that threaten this family, will be defeated, and that my children, and my grandchildren, will be allowed once more to bask in the glory of the sun, without fear, and be allowed to live in peace.'

'4 April 1988. Barnabas has received the serum for the last five nights. He has stood up to the agony well, though I cannot bear to see him in his pain. I know only too well, what he is going through. After the injection, he visits Sabre at the Veterinary Hospital. He says the doy is recovering well. I am glad. He's interest in becoming a doctor has returned. To such an extent, that he has been helping Julia effect a cure. If he were to be cured tonight, then I couldn't be happier. If he wants to be a doctor, I have no intention of stopping him. Nothing would make me more proud of him---'

Barnabas looked up from reading the journal. He had always thought that his father had disapproved of his career choice. As he'd read, the memory of that had happened that tear, came flooding back. He knew that he didn't have to read further. He remembered only too well, the fight that would ensue between Diabolos and his father. A fight for the souls of himself and his brother and sister.

Guilt washed over him, like waves over the sand, at low tide. He had been so wrong! So very wrong!

His eyes once more returned to the entry, and he forced himself to continue reading, though he already knew the outcome.

'--or the fact that im part due to him, Julia has found a solution to help not only him, but his brother and sister, too. But in order for that solution to work, they must be vampires also. I cannot agree to this. That he is affected is bad enough, but to deliberately infect them is another. Julia says it will happen to them eventually, and that she is only speeding the process. My mind is made up---Sarah and Daniel will not become guinea pigs! And I am equally determined, that Diabolos will NOT claim my son as his own!'

'5 April 1988. Peace reigns. Tonight everything has been resolved, and I have my son back.

Diabolos had caused the serum to fail sooner than expected. I had agreed to Daniel and Sarah, becoming vampires, if it meant saving them at all.

Only it didn't work as expected. Daniel was the only one effected, which has made Julia realise that Sarah, is a walking antidote to all of this. Because she has the antibody to the cell, she will never be affected the way Barnabas and Daniel have.
Maggie was also involved in the redemption. And a ghost of--- my future daughter, Stephanie.'

Stephanie! How did his father know about her? How could a child that had yet to be born, have anything to do with that night? It was impossible!

'Daniel has a new 'friend' called Stephanie. I only saw her briefly while out looking for Daniel, and she reminded me of Julia. But until Daniel mentioned it himself, I never made the connection. But tonight, when Diabolas was defeated, I saw her again, for just a moment. I had the feeling she was amused at the idea that Dan was right. As she disappeared, she winked, and I heard her say clearly, "see you soon---father!" Is it possible, that Julia and I will have a child of our own? Only the future will tell.'

So that explained, why he was so surprised, when Julia said she'd name a daughter Stephanie.

And why his father had been so determined that it would be a girl. He had known all along.

Just two months after that, Julia had announced that she was expecting, and his father had shown no surprise. They had married three weeks later.

He snapped the journal shut, and looked towards the window. The first rays of the morning sun were just breaking over the horizon.

He knew what he had to do, and he prayed that he wasn't too late. Quietly, so as not to waken Cindy, he re-entered her room, and quickly got dressed. He hurried left her a note, and then stealthily left the cottage.

==================================================================

When he reached the hospital, Julia was just coming out of his father's room. Her bearing suggested that something was wrong.

Panicked, he ran to her, and said, "How is he?"

She looked at him, her face pale, and her eyes red, from crying. Tears still pricked her emerald eyes. "He's worse, isn't he?" he whispered, guilt once more washing over him.

She stared at him uncomprehendingly. When she spoke it was in a voice barely above a whisper. Her lip quivering, as fresh tears threatened, she said, "I'm so sorry. Your father died ten minutes ago."

Dark Shadows is a Dan Curtis Production.