Soap Pt.9
From: marcos1
Date: Sun, 24 Oct 1999 13:56:53

Little girl turns school bully into gnome. Brain Blankenbecker knew a great story when he found it. This was it. Lately his talk show had been getting lousy ratings, but this fantastic story might just turn the tide. Brain waited outside the door of Mayor Blair. He just had to get an interview.

"You may come in."

"Mayor Blair," Brain said clearing his throat, "I'm sure that you know who I am." He held his shoulders back, his head high.

"No," Nicholas replied, "have we met before?" He was browsing through a book of fifth century magic. He wasn't sure how Miranda worked the spell, but it definitely reminded him of a Celtic curse.

"I am Brain Blankenbecker," Brain said, clearly annoyed, "of the 'Fabulous Brain' show." He looked around the room. The walls were covered with bookcases full of old books.

"Never heard of you," Nicholas replied smiling. "I'm afraid that I enjoy reading and rarely watch the tube." He raised his eyebrows. "Is there something I can help with with?"

"Cut the shit," Brain replied, his temper starting to flair, "you know why I'm here...the little girl...the gnome. Does that ring any bells?"

Nicholas stood up from his desk. He genteelly put the ancient text back in its place on the shelf. He walked over to Brain. "Listen to me...little man." There was a sense of controlled fury in his voice. "I'm only going to give you one chance, so listen to me closely. You will leave this room...leave this town...leave this state...and if this was the future...I would ask you to leave this planet...or I will bury you alive, turn you into a werewolf or vampire, a zombie...one of the walking dead...or simply kill you with my bare hands."

"Are you threatening me?" Brain asked. "Cause if you are...I'm not afraid." The small bald man stood-up and stared Nicholas in the eyes. "I'm a superstar talk host. You are nothing but a hick...a small town rube...the mayor of a strange little town that's home to a fish cannery...that's all."

Nicholas sat down and tried to compose himself. He was the mayor after all and it wouldn't pay to commit murder or use the black arts to curse someone. He reached for the phone. "Adam, could you please come in here for a minute?"

Brain looked up as a giant entered the room. The man must have been seven foot tall. He had thick dark hair and was wearing glasses. "Yes, Nicholas," the giant asked, "do you want something my friend?"

Nicholas smiled. "Yes, Adam, if you would be so kind as to show this gentleman out." Nicholas winked at Brain. "Adam is a visiting professor from Rocksport College...he is a personal friend of mine."

Brain felt his knees start to shake. He glanced at Nicholas, then at Adam. Suddenly Adam began to laugh. "The Fabulous Brain...I love your show," the giant said reaching his hand out.

"F-Fans everywhere..." Brain stuttered holding his hand out. He was trembling.

"Nicholas," Adam said, "this guy is great. He has: aliens from outer space, lesbian siamese twins, civil war ghosts, authors that write using automatic writing and fights galore. There is always a fight on his show."

"Adam is a professor of physics and astronomy," Nicholas said, "He was recently listed as one of the ten greatest minds of this century." He paused. "He is also a rather large fellow."

"Okay, Mayor Blair," Brain said, "I'll be leaving." He walked out the door next to the gentle giant.

Brain and Adam walked out into the parking lot, where Brain had parked his Jag. Adam was giggling and chattering like a school boy. He was delighted to be meeting one of his favorite tv stars. "Err...Adam," Brain said, "could you do me a big favor?"

"Anything for you," Adam replied, "you just name it."

"Help me get the low down on this Miranda Collins girl," Brain said. "She must be some kind of freak...changing her schoolmate into a dwarf and all..."

The next thing that Brain saw was a flying fist, as Adam hit him, then there was darkness, as he fell to the floor. Adam rubbed his hands and looked down at the man. He looked like a bald Ken doll, lying across the sidewalk.

Howard Grundy was riding his motorcycle. He saw this whole thing and was curious. "Hey, Adam Collins...why'd you hit that fellow? Did he do something to you?"

Adam spit on the ground. "He called my sister, Miranda, a freak..." he replied with distaste. "People used to call me that...I don't like it."

"Oh," Howard said, reviving his bike, "don't blame you there. Of course, people call my sister Selma names all the time...never bothered me yet...but to each his own. See you later."

"Good bye, Howard," Adam said, straightening his tie. He had a lecture to conduct at the new Collinsport Planetarium and he had better be on his way.

Brain lay on the ground. He was dead.

To be continued--