Subj: DS Fanfiction Submission
Date: 11/18/98 12:02:25 PM Central Standard Time
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Fractured DS History #39
Date: 10/21/98
From: ROBINV
Barnabas slammed down the telephone, cursing the day Julia had
talked him into having one installed at the Old House. Damn it! She
couldn't be doing this to him. . .could she? Not when when he was so
close to proposing!
He grabbed his cane and Inverness cape and slowly, painfully, made
his way to the garage, screaming, "WILLIE!" in a gravelly voice.
Willie, hobbling from the small cottage he had built mostly with his
own hands around the back of the Old House, ran his fingers
distractedly through mostly gray hair, glowering at his employer.
"Damn you, Barnabas, I was just getting some nookie from the
wife--and at my age, I need double shots of Viagra to get it up!"
"I don't care whether you can get it up or not," Barnabas intoned
sourly, raising his cane as if to give Willie a beating as he had in the
old days. He tottered and nearly fell, panting. "Drive me to Windcliff
immediately!"
Grumbling, fumbling in the pocket of his torn, worn jeans for his car
keys, Willie nearly pushed the slow-moving Barnabas into the back
seat of the station wagon, started the engine of the Astrovan and
drove the 100 miles or 3 miles or however long it took to get to
Wincliff (author is unsure of this one).
Willie had barely parked when Barnabas charged out of the van,
coughing wretchedly. "I've got to stop her!" he cried. He fell down
and Willie helped him up, brushing leaves and dirt from Barnabas'
cape.
"Stop who? From what?" Willie demanded.
"Julia. . .Getting married!" Barnabas panted, again waving his cane
like a madman in the air above his head. "I love her! I can't let her
marry to someone else!"
Willie shook his head and sighed. No use trying to talk sense into
Barnabas. There never had been. He helped his employer up the
stately steps leading to Julia's mental hospital and they both plowed
through the double doors and tumbled together onto the gleaming tiled
floor.
"Julia Hoffman, do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded
husband?" queried a voice within earshot.
"I do," said Julia's voice, loudly and clearly.
Barnabas and Willie stumbled into the first door on the right, Julia's
office. Standing there as witnesses were (and Barnabas felt so totally
betrayed, he couldn't believe it) David and Amy Collins. They were
all grown up now, with three kids of their own--a doctor, a lawyer
and a plumber, who was the richest of the bunch.
"Julia, who in God's name are you marrying?" Barnabas cried, barely
able to get out the words.
The groom, decked out impeccably in a teal-colored tuxedo, turned
and grinned at Willie and Barnabas. "Oh, no," Barnabas gasped, "it
can't be! You're not marrying. . ."
"Nicholas Blair," said Julia. "Barnabas what do you want?"
"I. . .I want to marry you, Julia. I. . .I love you," he said. He shot her
that hopeful-puppy look that had always worked on her in the past.
"Barnabas, you idiot, I am 65 years old!" Julia screamed. "Nicholas
has promised to make me young again, as young as I want! How the
hell long did you expect me to wait for you to decide you LOVE
me?"
Running one immaculate finger over his mustache, Nicholas grinned,
and said, "I don't need Viagra."
"GOODBYE, Barnabas. You had your chance and you blew it!" Julia
said curtly. Smiling, she smoothed down her short veil over her
pearl-white hair and turned to the startled minister. "You were saying.
. .?"
Love, Robin
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(subject) DS Fanfiction Submission
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Subject: DS Fanfiction Submission
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